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30 August 2013 @ 11:19 pm
"The happier the person, the larger the possibility that his or her mask is quite thick."

Intuitive eyes make me feel depressed rather than joyful. I've always thought it was normal to look at a joyful person and know instantly that they're carrying cartloads of emotional baggage. It's nothing new, but I try to look past the baggage and just focus on the present. What happened was that my reading of body language, of seeing the minute details gradually dulled. There has always been a reason for my need of silence; and that was to observe. Observe and feel the pulse on the wrist, a hug speaking volumes of a half-hidden heart. But those senses have dulled, and the process of regaining these old skills is something I have to renew.

I'm a Taurus with Aquarius ascendant, which means I really am more of a Sagittarius in restlessness and travel than I thought. I don't mind lying, and I'm always content with half-truths and lying by omission. It's part of my trade as a fox, after all. It's what I'm used to doing, what I end up doing and what I'll be doing every day of my mortal life. It's rare to get the full truth out of me, except if I truly care or I truly need you.

I find myself difficult to love, and so am not surprised that very few people can stand me, really.

But this isn't about me: it's about the people I am in regular contact with, my hair-trigger temper and my wish for all the things I see and feel to be correct.

Because if there's one thing I can't stand, it's wishful thinking, and wish-fulfillment because of a placebo effect.
Current Mood: restlessrestless
Current Music: Papa Jack & Chico Loco on TLC